How do I get my girlfriend to have more open communication in our relationship?

How can I open up communication with my girlfriend? I find that when ever I bring up an issue that I have with her she instantly shuts down and doesn't want to talk to me. She ends up getting mad at me for something that I was not happy with her about. Just today I brought up that I think we need more open communtication in our relationship and she got mad at me for some reason. I found these steps on ehow and this is all of the stuff that I want us to do in our relationship. How can I get her to try to follow these steps? We have been together for over 2 years.





1. Think before you speak. Too many times when we are used to being with someone in a marriage, we blurt out answers before really thinking about them. Be sure to say what you mean, but don't take forever to think of responses.





Step 2. Listen to what your spouse is saying without interrupting. This especially comes into play during arguments and strong emotional discussions. This respect for the other person improves the communicating atmosphere, allowing your spouse to express thoughts more freely.





Step 3. Watch your tone. Using an intimidating or condescending tone of voice will hinder the lines of communications instead of improving them. Being honest is always good, but this can be done without putting the other person on the defensive. Speak your piece without disturbing the peace.





Step 4. Set aside time to ';just talk.'; Having a scheduled time to communicate or talk is a good way to find out how your spouse is doing and to practice your skills. Practicing this on a consistent basis is key to improving over time. You may also have topics of discussion if you would like to raise.





Step 5. Watch your body language. The majority of what is communicated from person to person is not interpreted through words, but body language. Your spouse will often pay attention to your body language in order to cross reference the validity of what you are saying, so be sure that what you are saying, how you are saying it, and how you are displaying it, all match.





Step 6. Write a letter or note. One of the best things about using a letter is that what you write is what they will read. You may use a letter or note if you want to express something without being interrupted, or in times when you want to get all your ideas down and discuss them later.





Step 7. Concentrate on positive resolution. In other words, don't leave a session of communication on bad terms if at all possible. This will take an honest commitment from both sides if it is truly to work, but the rewards are worth it in the end if achieved.





Step 8. Consider going to counseling. Before you throw in the towel, consider that counseling is used for more than negative situations. It can be a great reinforcement to an already smooth-sailing marriage. Having a mediator or professional at times is helpful in order to see things that may be overlooked, or for advice about other venues and exercises to improve communication in a marriage.


How do I get my girlfriend to have more open communication in our relationship?
I feel like I act that way sometimes also with my boyfriend. Continue to ask her directly and kindly for what you would like. Make sure there isn't a sarcastic, mean or negative tone in your voice, as for some reason we females are very good at picking up on that. I like the letter writing idea. I sometimes can write things down easier than trying to say them and keep them all organized in my head. Maybe you can try asking her to write down her thoughts as to why it SEEMS hard for the TWO OF YOU to communicate. Keep your words away from you statements, like ';You this and you that'; or she will be more likely to close down. When you do break through with emotional intimacy, notice and say how nice it feels and how you hope the two of you can have more times like that. Good luck man, you sound like a good one...How do I get my girlfriend to have more open communication in our relationship?
Guy, I had the same dam problem, and I guess that's why we don't want to be together anymore. Girls are like cats, u have to make them feel comfortable and not force anything. Then u have to slowly open up to then and then hopefully shell open up to you. Some girls have bad past relationships and are afraid to open up. Some girls are tougher than armor. But if u push the right buttons then they should be good to go. U can't force her to open up. Use very slick words and things might go your way.
You have to be Persuasive and understanding.


You have to let her know that YOU know, how she might be uncomfortable or annoyed with talking about your situation. And then bring her to all the Ideas you see. If you really care about her, just let her know, and explain to her that you think it'd be a good Idea to talk about it.





GOOD LUCK :3


bye-bye